User blog:Awesomizer/The Illuminati Takeover


 * Hi. My name is Jeff. I'm a dude who likes potato chips, lightly salted with cocaine. It hurts my throat. I don't know why. I also like [REMOVED] .I'm just not into [REMOVED]. 


 * So, now that I have introduced myself, let me introduce you to my wife. Nurpledurple, will you come out?
 * "no fuk u"
 * "bitch pls"
 * "nofuku"

BAM!
 * Oh shit. My HP is going down. I need some medpacks that have magical white liquids that cure everything. This is why I hate bringing my Junk Jet into the house. My wife shoves a rock down into the barrel and shoots me. I hate that. I can't find one.


 * I walk outside and find a medpack. yay

what the hell its raining doritos and mtn dew k lemme eat sum. taste god. smok wed eryday

15 YEARS LATER Jimmy you little fucker turn off the caps


 * I wake up. My head is in the toilet. I'm bleeding on the chin. I see graffiti on the wall. "get rekt noscop lol". Then, I see a horrifying sight. My wife is dead. The humans she's eating are leaking out of her stomach. Oh god.

"God of the Dinosaurs, I Pray to You, SAVE MY FUCKING DINOSAUR WIFE!" Jimmy you little fucker turn off the caps I told you already

I MUST GET MY REVENGE!! Jimmy I'll fucking kill you.